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Lived experiences

Marriage, notions of love, and kinship support amongst poor women in Delhi

Shalini Grover is a Sir Ratan Tata Fellow in sociology at the Institute of Economic Growth, Delhi University Enclave, Delhi 110007. Email: sgrover{at}iegindia.org

In the popular discourse, ‘arranged marriage’ and ‘love marriage’ are assumed to be radically opposed forms of conjugal union, associated with equally polarised responses from the natal kin—approval and encouragement for the former and the opposite for the latter. This article critically examines the lived experiences of ‘arranged marriages’ and ‘love marriages’ among working–class women in Delhi in order to show how, in practice, conjugal relations, in both instances, elicit complex and heterogeneous responses from natal kin. The article highlights the role of emotional, material and practical support provided by the primary natal kin to their married daughters in shaping women's relationship with their husbands and affines. Using ethnographic methods to study the dynamics of married couples’ everyday marital conflicts in slums and low–income resettlement colonies in Delhi, this research makes a case for a deeper and more nuanced understanding of contemporary natal kin support structures, mother–daughter bonds and spousal intimacy in urban north India.

Contributions to Indian Sociology, Vol. 43, No. 1, 1-33 (2009)
DOI: 10.1177/006996670904300101


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